Sunday, January 23, 2011

My Dream Journal

I am a firm believer in the idea that if you write down your dreams and revisit them daily they will become apart of you and God will start to move and manifest himself in miracleous ways.  I'm sooo ready for my breakthrough.  So I'm just gonna list things that I am currently believing God for.  Just a few of my dreams:

1.  Supernatural Debt Cancelation
2.  A Career in Styling and Makeup Artistry
3.  My Perfect Match

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Excuse Me While I Speak My Mind...

I feel like I'm the only person reading this.  If I'm not please excuse me while I speak my mind for just a moment.  To protect people, places, and things this will only be sentences that describe situations.  It's so cold in the D was a funny song, but it should have been named it's so cold in the B and there is nothing funny about that.  It's cold and I don't mean the weather.  Maybe it's because I know my position is temporary, but for some reason I can't bring myself to call this place home.  It's like I'm in holding.  I can't go forward.  I can't move back.  Just in frozen.  Locked in a place that does not reflect my wants, my needs, or my goals.  I know I'm blessed to wake up everyday.  I don't take it for granted.  God is truly good, but it's then getting out of bed part that's hard.  It's feeling hopeless and helpless and feeling like the future is bleak.  I've lost my perspective.  I used to be this girl with a plan; I knew where I wanted to go and I could see the steps I would take to get there.  Now I'm just a wanderer hoping to make it from day to day.  What I want for myself no longer seems to matter now that I've signed a contract to "give back."  Honestly, I never considered myself much of a giver, but I did give.  Maybe I felt like I had something to prove of maybe I just was scared to chase what I really wanted, but for some reason I'm here.  Seeking to give.  But I didn't really stop and think all it would take from me.  Who I would become in the process.  I really don't know if I like this person.  I don't know how I feel about this person.  I don't know how I feel about this place.  Physically, mentally, or emotionally.  But here are somethings I do know.  I'm tired of compromising.  I'm sick of discussions and meetings of the mind.  I'm so over talking and discussing.  I just want silence and peace of mind.  I feel like I lost that somewhere along the way.  I'm not me, or maybe this is who I was always meant to be but I don't like it. I'm tired of people challenging my authority and my intelligence.  I've had about enough of grown people with horrible grammar and attitudes that are even worse.  People that know better but don't really care to do better.  Another thing is all those who can tell you how to do but they never did it.  Get serious  about life.  I have to rid myself of some people, places, and things but I just don't know how or when...

My Day in 6 Words 1.12.11

Delayed.  Annoying.  Lonely.  Irritating.  Blessed. Contradictory.

Monday, January 10, 2011

My Day in 6 Words 1.10.11

Rigorous.  Mundane.  Painful.  Loveless.  Void.  Draining.

Monday, January 3, 2011

My Day in 6 Words 1.2.11

Sad.  Bittersweet.  Productive.  Entertaining.  Informative.  Inspiring.

Saturday, January 1, 2011

A Day in the Life 12.31.10

Doing what I love with the people I love on the last day of 2010!

Clean Slate

I love the first day of a new year.  It's a clean slate.  No matter what happened before.  No matter how good (or bad) the last year was a new year provides a fresh new beginning.  and I'm all about new beginnings.  I want to be new and different this year, but this is not a resolution its a promise.  A promise that I will change my life for the better and I will start with this clean slate that I have been blessed to receive.  It's a profound gift and I plan to truly take advantage.  Here's to a new you in 2011.  Make your next move your best move...