Sunday, July 4, 2010


I swear I have to get some of this out of my system before it eats me alive.

I hate being here.  I hate this feeling.  I hate disappointing.  I hate feeling like I have no one.  I hate having to justify my emotions.  I hate having emotions.  I hate being misled.  I hate being controlled.  I hate my anger.  I hate not seeing my mommy.  I hate being an adult.  I hate crying.  I hate when you don't answer my calls.  I hate lies.  I hate ignorance.  I hate isolation.  I hate where I am right now.  I hate that no one understands.  I hate not being trusted.  I hate always being 2nd.  I hate holidays without my family.  I hate that I love more than I love me.  I hate not feeling reciprocity.  I hate hypocrisy.  I hate when you don't keep your promises.  I hate disappointment.  I hate being afraid.  I hate not being able to articulate my feelings.  I hate being jealous.  I hate not trusting more.  I hate not believing.  I hate self-doubt.  I hate pity.  I hate weakness.